Who Stole Your Confident Voice?

February 9, 2020

“Singing is not a commodity to buy, but a birthright that has been stolen from us.” A powerful quote from singer/songwriter Flip Breskin.

It’s a great reminder that throughout history singing has been a tribal experience that everyone participated in. No thought to whether you were good enough, confident enough; singing was part of living. 

Then something happened…

When opera was born out of royal entertainment in the 1600s, a new perspective emerged: they have a special talent and can sing–I don’t and I shouldn’t.

Opera stars became famous. With the birth of recording we became exposed to other “talented singers” and became convinced that unless we were born with a great voice–were “natural” singers–we couldn’t and shouldn’t sing.

A basic piece of our humanity had been stolen…

How do you steal it back? First, let go of the belief that you’re either born with a good voice or you’re not.

We’re ALL born with a powerful voice–just ask your mom. Then we’re sold a bill of goods that it’s not okay to be heard. 

This “turn it down” training begins early. “Children should be seen and not heard.” “Use your indoor voice.” “Shhh–this is a library, classroom, church, synagogue, hospital,” and on and on…

Being heard is often thought of as drawing attention to yourself; being conceited. Turn it down and fit in. The theft is complete…

The only place it’s “legal” to use all the power of your voice is at sporting events–or when you sing.

Secondly, stealing your voice back is all about learning how you’re wired to project and how to override your Vocal Defense Mechanism. That’s the part of your subconscious that constantly tells you it’s not safe to use your voice powerfully, to be heard, to be exposed.

You can reclaim the power that’s already there. 

You may be convinced you don’t have the kind of voice that can sing powerfully, sometimes called “belting” or singing with your “chest voice,” but it’s not about a type of voice. It’s about learning how you use what you were born with.

If you’re ready to be heard, it doesn’t matter how good your voice works. If you’re not ready to be heard, it doesn’t matter how good your voice works. For more on this read Vocal Myth #1.

Mark Bosnian

Mark is an award-winning songwriter and professional voice coach with 30+ years of experience teaching people how to take center stage. He has toured nationally with the 80's hit band Nu Shooz and coached Grammy award nominees, American Idol semifinalists, and singers on The Tonight Show.